Why Movement Matters for Young Minds
Play isn't just something children do for fun—it's arguably the most vital aspect of a young child's life. During those early formative years, children literally move to understand their world, while simultaneously learning to move with increasing proficiency. Through physical exploration, children discover their identities, test their abilities, and develop a crucial foundation for lifelong self-confidence.
According to research by Linda K. Bunker from the University of Virginia, children primarily gain self-confidence through successful experiences in the physical domain. Those seemingly simple moments of bouncing a ball ten times in a row, then striving for twenty by the following week, actually teach your child to set goals, practice with intention, and relish the satisfaction of achievement. Through these movement challenges, children not only develop physical skills—they also forge their personal identity and self-esteem. They learn something fundamentally significant: "I can accomplish tasks that require effort, and I can improve with practice."
The Critical Window: Motor Skills Develop from Ages 2-10
Many parents don't realize that there is a critical developmental window for motor skills. Research shows that most fundamental movement patterns are established between the ages of 2 and 10. During this time, children need exposure to a wide variety of physical activities—both fine motor skills, such as drawing or building with blocks, and gross motor skills like throwing, catching, kicking, and running.
What occurs during this period is extremely important. Children who face various movement challenges during these years develop better coordination and increased confidence in their physical abilities, and according to motor learning research, they become better equipped to learn new movement skills throughout their lives.
The research is clear: children who have diverse physical experiences become more adaptable learners who can acquire new skills more easily—a benefit that extends well beyond the playground.
Breaking Down Gender Barriers in Physical Play
One of the most surprising findings from the research is that during prepubescent years, there are no biological reasons boys and girls should have different skill levels in movement activities. The commonly used phrase "throws like a girl" has no biological foundation—instead, it reflects varying levels of experience and practice.
The Wilson Report uncovered a concerning trend: the average boy plays with his father for 0.96 days per week compared to just 0.68 days for girls. Fathers and other adults often focus on cultivating movement skills in boys while neglecting the same role for girls. Even more revealing, only 27% of girls aged 7-10 report that their fathers actively encourage them to play sports, while 44% of those aged 15-18 state that their fathers assume that responsibility—indicating that fathers often wait until girls demonstrate some skill before offering encouragement.
These discrepancies in early physical experiences have lasting effects. Beyond physical growth, children who lack sports experiences may face disadvantages in the professional world, where many terms and metaphors from sports enter business discussions. The research indicates that all children—regardless of gender—require equal opportunities to explore their physical abilities.
How Physical Activity Builds Self-Confidence
Children develop impressions of their own worth through their experiences and the feedback they obtain about their performance. When it comes to fostering genuine self-confidence, research by Dweck and Elliott reveals a surprising finding: success alone does not enhance self-esteem.
While successful experiences are certainly important, children also need to encounter occasional failures to learn resilience, develop problem-solving skills, and understand that they can influence many aspects of their performance through effort and practice. When children learn to persist through challenges and explore alternative solutions, they cultivate a healthier relationship with both success and setbacks.
Interestingly, research shows that teachers and parents often unintentionally undermine children's confidence by overpraising easy achievements. This "expectancy effect" conveys a subtle message that we have low expectations for the child. In contrast, providing specific, constructive feedback along with encouragement communicates your belief in the child's ability to improve and reach higher skill levels.
Creating the Right Challenges for Your Child
How can you create the ideal environment for developing both motor skills and self-confidence? Research suggests that the most effective approach involves aligning challenges with your child's current abilities—a concept that motor development experts call "optimal challenge."
Children love to be challenged, but completing a task that is too easy offers little satisfaction or growth. The ideal challenge encourages children to stretch just beyond their current skill level. For instance, if your child can throw and catch a ball successfully, you might challenge them with: "How high can you throw the ball and still catch it?" or "Can you throw the ball in the air, clap your hands, and still catch it?"
Notice that these challenges focus on personal improvement rather than competition. Instead of asking "Who can clap their hands the most times?" which encourages comparison with others, ask "How many times can you clap your hands before catching the ball?" This subtle difference encourages children to focus on their own improvement rather than comparing themselves to others.
Here's a simple developmental sequence for catching skills that shows how to progressively increase the challenge:
- Can you throw the ball in the air and catch it?
- How high can you throw the ball and still catch it?
- Can you throw the ball, clap your hands, and catch it?
- Can you throw the ball, touch the ground, and catch it?
- Can you throw the ball, turn around, and catch it?
- Can you turn one more time than you did yesterday?
The Parental Disconnect: Do As I Say, Not As I Do
The research uncovers a concerning trend: parents today exercise with their children for an average of less than one day each week. Half of parents never engage in vigorous exercise, and fewer than 30% of parents with children in grades 1-4 participate in moderate to vigorous activities.
This lack of parental modeling sends a powerful message to children about the value of physical activity. The data shows that parental activity patterns particularly influence their daughters' interest in sports. Among girls who currently participate in sports and fitness activities, 70% have parents or teachers who also engage in sports or fitness.
The good news is that attitudes are changing. Currently, 87% of parents believe that sports are equally important for boys and girls—a positive shift in perspective that can help close the gender gap in physical confidence and competence.
Letting Children Take the Lead
As children grow and mature, involving them in planning their own movement activities offers significant benefits. Research by Weiss found that when children actively design their own movement challenges, they create optimal learning experiences tailored to their individual needs.
By establishing their own goals, children learn to concentrate on the process of improvement rather than just the outcomes. Most children between ages 5 and 8 naturally focus on the learning process—understanding how to do something—rather than on competitive results. This process-oriented approach aids children in recognizing that their actions directly influence their success and that they can control their own improvement.
Practical Tips for Parents and Educators
Based on the research, here are concrete ways to foster both physical skills and self-confidence:
- Provide a variety of movement opportunities for all children, regardless of gender.
- Create progressively challenging activities that align with your child's developmental level.
- Offer specific, constructive feedback instead of generic praise.
- Allow children to experience challenges occasionally (within reason) to foster resilience.
- Involve children in designing their own physical challenges.
- Demonstrate enjoyment of physical activity yourself.
- Emphasize personal improvement rather than comparing with others.
- Ensure all children have plenty of time for unstructured physical play.
Finding the Balance
Physical development isn't just about creating star athletes; it's about helping all children build confidence in their bodies' capabilities. Research indicates that well-structured physical challenges provide children with evidence of their increasing competence and control over their environment.
When children recognize that their efforts lead to success and that they can influence their own improvement through dedication and practice, they establish a foundation of self-confidence that extends well beyond physical skills. This confidence becomes part of their identity and shapes how they tackle challenges in all areas of life.
What movement opportunities are you creating for your child today? And how might you adjust your approach to help them discover their physical capabilities while building lasting self-confidence?
Based on: Bunker, L. K. (1991). The Role of Play and Motor Skill Development in Building Children's Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem. The Elementary School Journal, 91(5), 467-471.